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SUMMER OF LOVE
Kidd With More 'Model' Behavior
Mike Fisher -- DB.com
Dirk’s got a girlfriend. Obama gets emails from Scarlett Johansson. Bill Clinton might’ve gotten nasty with Gina Gershon. Lindsay Lohan, having test-driven all the men in Hollywood, is now dating a chick. If your name in “Vanessa’’ you might be sleeping with Kobe. Paul Pierce is walking the streets of LA with a babe – and a ballcap emblazoned with the letters “LA.’’ Even Jeff Van Gundy, born to star in “Before-and-After’’ photos as “Before,’’ is all hot for Alyssa Milano (or is that Vanessa Minnillo?)
And not to be outdone in this Summer of Love, Jason Kidd has engineered a major trade.
The Mavs point guard is rumored by the New York Post’s “Page Six’’ to now be dating model May Anderson. The way the Post writes it:
MODEL May Andersen sure loves "kids" - that is, guys who sport the name. Andersen, who was linked to Kid Rock, is now dating Dallas Maverick Jason Kidd. "They just spent the week in Palm Beach," said our source, "and are planning to go to Europe together." Kidd filed for divorce from his wife, Joumana, last year
Well, I didn’t say it was well-written. … but there it is.
It really is difficult for we mere mortals to keep up. It was just a few weeks ago that J-Kidd was very cozy and apparently very serious about the lovely model Hope Dworaczyk, who was invited to be part of the Mavs’ family when she attended the Tux and Tennies charity gala. And of course, Jason was dating Hope (who was reportedly preggers) while at the same time still working his way out of his marriage to Joumana, with whom he shared an infamously tumultuous relationship.
(Just to keep 'em straight: That's Joumana and then Hope and now May, if you're scoring at home. Which you might be -- but you're not scoring at home the way Jason Kidd is scoring at home.)
I’m not voicing any disapproval here. And I’m certainly not jealous; my I.C.Program works just fine for me, thank you. (“I.C.’’ = “Involuntary Celibacy.’’) But it does seem like everybody is gettin' some.
The Presidential candidate getting support from ScarJo? She jokes that she’s “engaged’’ to the candidate for whom she has campaigned, and you know what? As a member of a White House ménage, she’s a skillion steps up from both Monica Lewinsky and Condi Rice. (I'm searching to see if John McCain has his own Hollywood groupie. Betty White, maybe?)
Bill Clinton and Gina Gershon? Denials all around, but. … it probably depends on what the meaning of “is’’ is.
Kobe and Vanessa and Vanessa? Hey, if you’re gonna cheat on your wife, it is absolute genius to do so with a woman who shares her name. Eliminates any pillow-talk misstatements, you see.
The Truth and his girl, Julie Landrum? Boston fans are probably more bothered by that LA cap – though Pierce, a native Angelino, has the birthright.
JVG and Milano and Minnillo? He broached this topic during ABC’s Game 3 telecast, apparently because he saw Minillo at the game (possibly escorted by any number of her celeb flames, a list that includes everybody from Derek Jeter to Orlando Bloom to Scottie Pippen to Nick Lachey) and confused her with Milano (who’s been passed around by athletes ranging from Fred Durst to Justin Timberlake to Barry Zito to pretty much every hockey player).
JVG is cruising for an STD.
I still like Dirk Nowitzki’s Rocky-esque “Women Weaken Legs!’’ approach. Yes, he’s got a girlfriend. She’s American. She’s got two eyes, two nostrils, and likes tall guys. (Or, likes one tall guy.) And that’s about all we know about her. We won’t be seeing her at the Olympics; he’s focusing on basketball.
Here’s hoping that Jason Kidd -- who historically has some issues with the fairer sex – can learn a lesson from The UberMan. Nothing wrong with interning at a hedge fund company, educating himself on how to squeeze more out of a buck. Nothing wrong with sexual dalliances with supermodels, finding himself a main squeeze.
But speaking purely as a Mavs fan, I’m hoping Jason Kidd – between this squeeze and that squeeze – finds some time to also practice squeezing off about 1,000 jumpshots a day.
934am june 12 2008