Morning Donuts: Driving Miss Eddy Curry

Some of this stuff is crazier than Tracy Morgan’s acceptance speech for “30 Rock,’’ eh? "Deal with it, Cate Blanchett!'' Donuts include: How injuries might clog Dallas’ trade thoughts, dancing with Erin Andrews’ sister, more eye-popping jokes and Chuck Cooperstein vs. Brad Sham. Oh yeah. And the Knicks Eddy Curry being accused of sexual harrassment. Of Eddy's driver. Whose name is ... Dave.

  DONUT 1: ESPN’s Marc Stein notes that DJ Augustin’s injury has slowed any desire Charlotte has to move their other PG, Raymond Felton, to Dallas.

  DONUT 2: And yes, if you are wondering, the same logic applies to Josh Howard and his wrist.

  DONUT 3: If you didn’t get enough of my eye-poking humor as it relates to Mavs losses at Phoenix and Sacto, up on DB.com Boards I go ahead and pull out at top-of-my-head “Valkyrie’’ reference.

  DONUT 4: Bet-you-didn’t-know trivia: I was talking to Bob Ortegel the other day, asking him for his thoughts of LAC’s Mike Dunleavy as a coach. And Coach O spits out a doozy: When Bob was a coach at Drake in the early-‘70’s, he coached against an East Carolina star named. … Mike Dunleavy.

  I guess I think of Bob being younger than that. And of Dunleavy being older.

  Maybe that’s that the aging effect coaching the Clippers can have on a man?

  DONUT 5: ‘Melo down. Tuesday night at Denver shouldn’t be that big a problem for a good Mavs team. You would feel better about it all, of course, if you knew this was a good Mavs team.

  DONUT 6: My boy Richie Whitt has his list of the top 10 Sports Broadcasters in Dallas History. 

  Coop vs. Sham? Please discuss.

  DONUT 7: I DID discuss it. With Coop. He humbly thinks Richie is way off. But Chuck is wrong. Richie is not that far off.

  DONUT 8: Sorry for not getting to this in a more timely manner: Matt Moore does the NBA and “The Dark Knight’’ and he does it right.

  DONUT 9: Maybe I’m an old man. But I’m hoping I’m not the only guy who fails to see the humor in the case of the USC linebacker who did the bump-and-grind on Erin Andrews – without the approval or knowledge of the comely sideline reporter. (If you haven’t seen the video, have at it. And tip to The Big Lead for being just about the only spot on the blogo that joins me in thinking its way through this.)

 Wait a sec. Let me re-phrase that. I AM an old man. Because if Rey Maualuga were my son, I’d be ashamed of the boy.

  DONUT 10: By the way, Rey has since apologized. Belatedly.

  DONUT 11: Maybe Rey can move on to fake-grinding on an unknowing – but also comely – sister of Erin Andrews? At least this Kendra Andrews is some sort of dancer or something.

  DONUT 12: I suppose Eddy Curry's defense on this will make perfect sense. And that Dave is confused, or lying, or maybe misinterpreted Eddy's ... come-on. (Some very graphic stuff discussed in the allegation. As Deadspin says, we find out that Curry may be a super-aggressive anti-Semitic closet homosexual with a penchant for gun play. So read it at your own risk.)

   Suddenly, though, being too fat to play professional basketball is the least of Eddy Curry's problems.

612pm jan 12 2009