Tuesday Donuts: All Dolled Up

     Tuesday Morning Donuts … in which Mark Cuban smiles through tired eyes, Marcin Gortat can only hope the paperwork doesn’t go through, “The Buck Shot’’ enters DB.com vernacular, and Tony Romo breaks up with his “Barbie’’ …

     DONUT 1: Donnie Nelson’s quote this morning in the DMNews, reflecting on the Gortat That Is Getting Away:

     “We still feel terrific about our team. … We've got Erick Dampier, and he's more than filled that position for us in the past. We're ready to go to war with what we've got. I'm sure that we're going to continue to be active in the free-agency and trade fronts."

     Bothers you, eh? Because you’ve heard the “We Love Our Team’’ and “We Like Our Boys In Blue’’ and “We’re Going To War With These Guys’’?

     May I make two calming points?

     DONUT 2: The first calming point: Read the entire quote. You know, the words after the words “go to war with what we’ve got.’’

     “I'm sure that we're going to continue to be active in the free-agency and trade fronts.’’

    You may reserve the right to wait-and-see on this promise, and OK. Wait and see, then.

     DONUT 3: What else, exactly, do you want him to say post-Gortat?

    “Son of a bitch! There goes my summer! All my hopes! All my dreams! Oh, the humanity!’’?

     DONUT 4: Tony Romo breaks up with Jessica Simpson, thus ruining her plans for a “Barbie-and-Ken’’-themed birthday party. Turns out, Romo also wants to bang Skipper, Midge, etc.

     DONUT 5: Lots of misinformation and confusion out there about Erick Dampier’s contract and what makes it “super-expiring’’: This year, Damp must play at least 2,100 minutes in the 70 regular-season games in which he plays the most minutes ... so he's got to average 30 minutes a game IN 70 GAMES.
     Let me assure you, that was NEVER gonna happen. ... and with The DUST Chip, it's certainly not gonna happen now. I envision Humble Billy Hayes sounding a buzzer when Damp gets to Minute No. 29 in every game, alerting Carlisle to send Erick to the showers.

     DONUT 6: DFW loves BWS’s. 

     DONUT 7: So is Rodrigue Beaubois’ new nickname “Roddy Buckets’’? Don’t worry. Cuban calls everybody that. Remember “’Gana Buckets’’?

     DONUT 8: In that same Cuban interview in which he tosses out “Roddy Buckets,’’ the video is worth a good close look to us intense Mavs watchers. Cuban’s smile is smiling. It is playful. It is optimistic. But that’s just the bottom half of his face. The top half of his face? It’s not smiling.

     DONUT 9: “The Buck Shot.’’  For Odom or whatever. I’m telling you, Mavs management actually has a clue. I mean, other teams have clues, too. Like, you know, Orlando, as Hollinger points out. But let’s see how this thing unfolds before we draw-and-quarter anybody down yonder on Sundance Square, OK?

     DONUT 10: Orlando’s got Bass, Gortat and Ryan Anderson. … all guys with Dallas connections of a sort. What they also might have is two of the three of them unhappy on a given night. Bass went there thinking he was gonna start at the 4. … I’m told Gortat’s been told he’ll get a chance to start at the 4. … Anderson comes from the Nets having started at the 4. … and doesn’t Rashard Lewis still play there?

    It’s a good problem to have. But it’s a problem.

     DONUT 11: Instant updates on the Mavs and whatnot from DB.com are available at twitter.com/fishsports ... Follow, if you dare.

     DONUT 12: I finally found the quote I’ve been using as an example of the misperceptions that seem to hang around the Mavs... Of a Dallas team with Shawn Marion, this website writes:

     “It would very likely be a below average defensive team though, best case likely being a mediocre defense.’’

     The Mavs are going to get worse on defense by adding a player who will instantly become their best defender? Huh!