Mavs Monday Morning Donuts: Happy Birthday!

Monday Morning Donuts, with reflections on Mavs shooting, Mavs winning and a little football tossed in as well. ... oh, and you can send me my birthday present any time now. ...

    DONUT 1: The Mavs are winning without shooting well. When was the last time that happened to coach Rick Carlisle’s bunch?

    Never.

    The Mavs are shooting 40.9 percent this year – that’s awful – and are ranked 25^th in that department in the NBA. Dirk’s six points below his career average, Jet hasn’t yet found his range, J-Ho isn’t playing yet … but the Mavs are 2-1 despite all of it. I don’t have this number in front of me (75-Member Staff Research Team … Activate!) but I’m willing to bet that in games last year when the Mavs shot down there in that 42-percent, 40-percent, or lower-percent, they never won. Finding other ways beyond shooting to have success … when you just know the shooting is going to come around. … is very encouraging.

    DONUT 2: Here’s another thing Dallas didn’t do last year: String together a skillion wins in a row. I’m pretty sure I’ve got this one right (but just in case … 75-Member Staff Research Team … Activate!): Dallas, facing games this week against Utah, New Orleans and Toronto, has a chance to win ‘em all. (Right?) And if the Mavs do that, it’ll be a five-game win streak. … matching last year’s longest run.

    Five games. That’s it?

    Here’s hoping Dallas gets on that sort of roll; it’ll be much easier to get to 50 total if they can at times get more than five in a row.

     DONUT 3: NFL head of officiating Mike Pereira is reiterating that protecting officials is a hot NFL issue … and logic suggests helmets would be a start.

   The challenge here isn’t the design or style of the helmet.

   The challenge here, frankly, is pride.

   Baseball’s first- and third-base coaches are just now getting around to wearing helmets to avoid line-drive injuries; it’s a natural fit in baseball, of course, with batters obligated to wear headgear. Hockey players came kicking and scratching into the movement. I assume that in baseball and even in football, the advent of the helmet was considered a step closer to the “pussification’’ of sports.

   In the NFL, plenty of guys still don’t wear mouthpieces. (We see what a pain it can be to wear ‘em every time Tony Romo has to bark out a signal at the line of scrimmage … but only after removing his mouthpiece.) Receivers don’t wear kneepads. Some don’t even wear thigh pads. Hip pads went out of style 20 years ago. New technology in knee braces are met with resistance.

   Dear NFL officials: I know there are a few of you who will say, “Aw, what’s next? You gonna put a skirt on us?’’ And my answer is, “Yes, if it keeps you from suffering brain damage when a 300-pound man tramples you, yes, I’m gonna put a skirt on you.’’

   This is a no-brainer. Pun intended.

     DONUT 4: From Berry Tramel of The Oklahoman, chronicling KD’s horrible shooting night: "Tossing the ball through the hoop from every corner of Oklahoma County seems to come natural for Kevin Durant, but Sunday night he couldn’t have hit a Del Rancho chicken fry if you’d have spotted him the gravy.’’

     DONUT 5: “Who is Quinton Ross?’’

    If you are haunted by the question, here is your excellent answer.

     DONUT 6: The “FISH on FOOTBALL’’ stuff is up and running at Blogging The Boys. Stats, snark, insight, quote, news, more snark. ... please head on over to Mike Fisher’s new Cowboys home at BtB and enjoy! Show your support for all things FISH and check it out!

     DONUT 7: Your DallasBasketball.com T-shirt is here! The “DallasBasketball.com classic’’ and “The UberMan’’ and the “Fish for Lunch’’ and “The DUST Chip’’ are yours for the taking! Please visit the DB.com Store today! This would make a great present ... for you AND for me!

    DONUT 8: Alex Rodriguez has paintings in his home that portray him as a centaur. Well, he’s got the horse’s-ass part right.

    DONUT 9: Green Bay didn’t want Brett Favre in its backfield anymore. So ironically, Favre is now in Minnesota’s backfield. … and Minnesota’s defensive linemen are in Green Bay’s backfield.

    Favre – who has always been one of my favorites ;) – is now running the Vikings. And Aaron Rodgers has now been sacked 14 times in two games by Jared Allen and company.

    DONUT 10: The Mavs are promising to be a good team at home. Five-game win streak, here we come?

    DONUT 11: As always, there are legitimate criticisms to be leveled at Cowboys coach Wade Phillips. Some of those are certainly X’s-and-O’s-related. And, arguably, some of those are personality-related.

   But none of those have anything to do with rewarding teams with a “Victory Monday Off.’’

   A coach rewarding a team with a day off following a win is not the invention of Wade Phillips. It’s a common practice in football, a carrot dangled on a stick, a reward for a team trying to remain healthy and happy over the course of a seven-month season.

   This is one of those deals that can only be evaluated after all the results are in – and even then the “evaluation’’ is fake-deep. If the Cowboys were to beat Seattle, “Victory Monday’’ would automatically be deemed a success. A Cowboys loss, and it would automatically be the fault of “Victory Monday.’’

   Victory Monday was revisionist history waiting to happen. … so now that Dallas was successful, does Wade get credit for the proper handling of his club?

   DONUT 12: The National Football Post reacts to my story about DeMarcus Ware’s 78,000,001th dollar by reporting that some NFL people are seriously pondering whether there is 100 pennies worth of salary-cap violation in there.

   To the first NFL official who really had this idea pop into his demented head, I solemnly pledge to pay Ware’s fine and to pay it to said NFL official. Please send me 100 self-addressed stamped envelopes and I’ll start mailing you those pennies, one at a time.

   Spread over 100 years.

   DONUT 13: Happy birthday to me! And while I am turning 50, I really don’t look or feel a day over, say, 53 or so.